A Parent in the Business
I recently was presented with a situation where a business owner had hired her father in the position of CFO. At the time the father had just retired from another business and had the skill set that was needed in the daughter’s business. The fact that there had been a long-standing negative relationship between the two was pushed aside in an attempt to be expedient, and with the thought that perhaps this might improve the personal relationship between them. As you might imagine, the father had done things his way for years and was not really open to taking orders from his daughter.
So the negative relationship was continuing, now on a business basis as well. When questioned in any fashion the father threatened to retire again, but the daughter still needed the help, so they’d have a discussion and reach what she thought was agreement. But, of course, the father went back to doing things as he saw fit, rather than letting her take the lead. She found this lack of control very draining on her emotionally and physically. But she still needed someone to function as CFO.
After discussing it with me she realized she really needed to find someone who would be willing to work WITH her and follow her lead. Her plan is to bring on a consultant to function as temporary CFO. If he/she works out the person will become permanent. Over the next 30 days she will actively seek a replacement for her father and tell her father that she is accepting his retirement. She expects to get some flack and more negativity, but she has realized that her father will never change (cannot change) and she needs to take back control of her business.
Too often I see business owners putting up with employees, often parents, who are non-productive or counterproductive. Sometimes a work-around can be made. I have one client whose father handed over the business to her but remained in the business. Because he functions mostly as an ambassador he is not blocking productivity. In this case it’s good for the parent and the business, but think long and hard before agreeing to have a family member in your business, especially a parent. Make sure they are not holding you hostage in your own business.
Do you have an interesting story to share about child-parent business relationships?
Partner Communications Session 2
The husband and wife partnership I started working with a few weeks ago has progressed nicely. Last week there was a complaint from the wife (aka Jane) that she needed access to ‘resources under the husband’s (aka Joe’s) control and Joe had not been willing to agree. Their homework assignment was to discuss it again to see if they could come to agreement. Upon hearing more from Jane, Joe became convinced that it was better to designate time from his staff than for Jane to go outside to get the needed resources. In the future the decision might be different. It was agreed that if either had need of the other’s services and they could not agree to provide them with staff, the other would have the option to hire outside resources, keeping in mind the return on investment of the decision.
Also historically they said they often disagreed with each other in meetings with their executive staff. Because this took extra time and was not a good face to be presenting to those who had major responsibilities, they decided that when they found themselves disagreeing they would stop the discussion and say they would work out the disagreement at a later time and come back with a unified position next time. At this past week’s meeting they didn’t disagree in the meeting, but realized they didn’t agree and decided to discuss it afterward. By taking it up specifically after the meeting they were able to reach agreement and are prepared to come back next time with a unified statement. Both felt it wasn’t perfect, but that progress had been made.
The bottom line: in order to move forward on anything, agreement must be reached. When there is disagreement it saps energy and time and keeps things from moving forward.
Husband and Wife Business Partner Challenges
I recently started working with a husband and wife partnership running a company of 40 employees and $20M in revenue. They came to me because they seemed to butt heads whenever they had a decision to make. Each had strong feelings about how things should be done and frequently found it difficult to reach an agreement. Fortunately they both were eager to find a resolution to their communication issues, which they had not been able to resolve on their own.
In addition to finding out where they were together and where they were apart, I learned each of their strengths. I asked if there was a delineation of duties, with each having responsibility for specific areas. While it seems they knew their areas of strength they did not have anything like a table of organization.
So their first assignment was to agree that each would be the final decision-maker for specific areas. The husband took web site development and marketing; the wife took operations and product management. For projects they agreed that the individual responsible for the department bearing the bulk of the work would oversee the project from beginning to end and would assign tasks to the other departments if needed.
They also agreed that before major decisions were made in their areas they would run the details and facts by the other partner. If the other partner had issues or concerns they would take 24 – 48 hours to consider everything before making a final decision.
This change meant they would need to communicate the new structure to their department heads, which is on the agenda for next time.
They have used the new system for 2 weeks and things seem to have gone smoothly so far. We’ll see what comes up as new projects are started and the staff adjust to a clearer delineation of roles and responsibilities.